Intuitive Activism

When I share information on social media it is because I am expressing opinions and/or facts regarding something about which I feel passionate. I try to avoid falling into the left-right paradigm and I attempt to educate myself about matters that concern us all as human beings who, like it or not, share this space we call Earth. We all know that research and the results that follow can be manipulated to support an argument for either side of an issue. As such I prefer to read and hear the actual stories and experiences of people who have been affected directly by policies and business practices that come to our attention. For example I oppose Monsanto's policies and actions not because some organization told me to, not because of a study or two that I read, but because I know that by upsetting the balance of our planet we set in action a chain reaction of events whose outcome we cannot control or predict. The Earth is an interconnected web of life forms all which are interdependent on one another, and that includes us. We have already done so much damage to our ecosystem that we cannot afford to condone policies that will continue to destroy the fabric of life.

"The notion that non-human life forms are of lesser importance is part of the Judeo-Christian Capitalist paradigm and therefore deserves to be challenged."

This is a statement that I presented to a group of people that likes to address problems in terms of economic theories, class structure and numerous 'isms'. I phrased my comment in this way in an attempt to relate to individuals in their own language so to speak. I felt it was necessary to do so because I have witnessed the dismissive attitude that erupts when we start talking about the environment or about concepts like human emotion and spiritual well being; you know those things that are not scientifically quantifiable. I did it not because I am ashamed of being labeled as an environmentalist, or even an idealist but because I truly wanted to engage people in a dialog about our relationship with Earth and her non-human inhabitants. Two days later I have not received any response, nothing. Did I really venture that far outside the comfort zone of concrete conceptualization?

Funny isn't it that we all who are so fed up with a system that places money and political power before human need would be so obsessed with economics and politics. I mean if our goal is to truly break free from the invented reality that is so well maintained by the corporate owned media then why aren't we looking elsewhere for answers? If you were trapped in a well would you look up at the light to devise a way to escape or would you sit on the floor counting pebbles?

Meanwhile, in other circles there is a growing focus on spiritual understanding and expansion of consciousness. 2012 has come and gone and the world didn't end but the time for a new reality is here. There is wisdom and hope to be found in many of these circles and as someone who always followed my inner voice I am comfortable with exploring myriad possibilities of human potential and consciousness. However I sometimes wonder if some of these people are aware of what's going on here in 3-D reality. I can appreciate the notion of not pouring one's energy into negativity, but I also am not okay with ignoring societies problems.

Fortunately I have finally encountered a few sources who know as I do that the spiritual and the political are, like everything, ultimately interconnected. The words spiritual and political feel too limiting here, perhaps I could put it this way; the quest for enlightenment and esoteric understanding and the quest for social justice are not separate journeys. In fact they are perhaps mutually inter-dependent. Naturally we all chose the path we travel in our quest and we are all free to choose a different path at any time. I know I have taken some detours but recently I'm finding that my detours always seem to lead me back home to my truth, to my most fundamental understanding of this life's lesson plan. In my version of the truth, because we all have our own versions you know, there is no separation between the intuitive and the scientific. I have tried to apply myself effectively in the world of social activism without the accessing the spiritual, or intuitive, because I felt awkward. I felt that the people I was relating to wouldn't understand that part of me and therefore would dismiss anything I had to offer because of it. They would throw out the baby with the bathwater. I now realize that, as my Mother used to say "If they are your true friends, they will accept your values even if they don't completely agree". I decided quite some time ago that I was no longer going to sacrifice my personal values and beliefs for the sake of maintaining some kind of false harmony in my personal relationships; why would my social and civic relationships demand even more of me than that? I need to be fully present in my entire being with all that is true and dear to me in order to contribute authentically and effectively in these groups. If that means I may speak out on behalf of the rights of butterflies and nature spirits along with the rights of the two legged beings that live among them, then that's how it will be. If people decide not to work with me because of that, then they are free to choose another path. I'll be on the one with the rainbows and butterflies.

Political Burnout

My most recent facebook status: 'watching the news makes my head want to explode'. My only New Years resolution is to balance the information I take in with images of things that make me happy. Kittens, wildlife, tiny houses, cartoons, faeries, things like that. Images that can transport my mind to a kinder happier place than the world that is shown on television, online and in the news. I feel like if I see one more dead child as the result of a drone attack or a school shooting, or hear one more story about a woman being brutally raped or think about the daily mass destruction of our environment, the planet that sustains our life, I will simply fall into a spiral of despair and give up entirely. I don't know what that would look like, what form of behavior it would take, to give up entirely but I don't think I want to find out either.

A lot of activists I've come to know over the past year or two have become rather withdrawn in recent months. Many of them describe feeling burnt out and I don't blame them. It's a tough and often thankless task. There are rarely immediate results and there are no medals or awards, no pay no fringe benefits. For every victory a new issue seems to come along and settle itself comfortably in the space left behind by the last problem. The rich get richer, the poor get poorer and war is endless. And to make matters worse there is a huge segment of the population who has no clue as to what's going on and wonders why people like me bother to walk around chanting carrying signs and canvassing when there is no visible problem to their eyes. There is nothing like the despair one feels when you have spent an entire day in crummy weather walking the streets trying to raise some awareness only to come home turn on the tv and see the news briefly describe a 'handful of college students protesting' when you know damn well there were over 500 people representative of the full spectrum of the American demographic. That pit in your stomach grows even deeper when you realize the next news story is a good 5 minutes dedicated to a sausage recipe.

After as many decades as I have spent on this planet I am intimately familiar with the cycles of enthusiasm, despair and burnout and I have learned to recognize the signs of impending surrender. That is when it is time to let go of strict adherence to political correctness and symbolic sacrifice. There is no room for perfectionism in an imperfect world.

We don't have to have all the answers, we don't have to know intimate details of every horror that is being perpetrated around the world on any given day. Doing this only makes our task seem insurmountable and strips away any sense of power.

Some days you just need a break. You need to laugh. I would say these things are needed every day, in frequent doses. It does not mean you bury your head in the sand and turn your back on your values and ideals. Those will always be there when you are ready to face them. Adding a little fun, or humor or fantasy to life provides the strength and life force to be able to utilize your energy when and where it is needed.

The Lovely Crazy Quilt of Life

I've recently returned for a much needed 'news break'. Of course for me a news break isn't an absolute avoidance of all news, it's really more like a news diet. I still watch most of Democracy Now in the morning and I'll catch some clips on my social media newsfeeds. My break involves not responding to the feeds, not engaging in discussion or argument with other people and generally practicing an aware detachment from the information. It also involved spending more time on pages featuring animals, gardening and tiny houses. This diet is healthy for me personally in that it prompts me to focus on dreams, visions and solutions; the stuff that hope is made of. Without hope I can become incredibly frustrated...and snarkey.

Now that I have re-framed my thinking into a much more peaceful state of mind I'm finding it difficult to return to my habit of throwing my two cents in at every opportunity presented by the incessant barrage of opinion I find online. I'm sure this has made a few people happy. Rather than reacting from my boiling gut of self righteous opinion, I am more inclined to observe and evaluate the information that is laid out before me like a crazy quilt of mismatched fabrics, stunning in it's entirety but if examined piece by piece the eye is drawn to areas that individually might cause a very different reaction. The crazy quilt in this sense is the prevailing agenda and generally agreed upon ideals and desires of those I identify as my peers. The individual scraps are the more complex questions that either cause us to refocus on the whole, or take a closer look at that funny bit that stands out. When we call attention to the odd scrap that doesn't quite fit the big pattern we are taking a risk, we risk becoming the odd bit of fabric ourselves, don't we?

The more reactions I see to recent events, the more I value my distance from any one group or culture, because I see people who I otherwise respect beginning to unquestioningly follow the patterns laid out before them. And I see them applying labels and categories to other individuals who may dare to call attention to the odd scraps. They often do this anticipating that the individual will follow the preconceived agenda that accompanies the title. When someone dares to speak their own mind, to express an original well thought out analysis of a unique issue through the lens of a unique set of eyes there tends to be a moment of silence and confusion. How is it that in our rebelling we fall into expected patterns of rebellion. Are these patterns just as destructive as the prior patterns of conformity within the status quo? Hell yes, they are!

I recently told someone that I no longer adhere to any 'isms' because I refuse to be pigeonholed...and besides I haven't found any 'ism' that speaks to the complexity that I, as a unique human being, embody. Even within the 'isms' there are subdivisions. Take feminism for example, there has been a great deal of discussion about the varied manifestations of feminism in this country. At their worst they have all proven to be deviously divisive, at their best they have forced us to look beyond our own personal perceptions to welcome a new scope of interpretation of what it means to be a Woman.

Things just aren't that simple, life is complex and messy and constantly evolving. Stagnant values may have the appearance of dedication and endurance, but in practice they get stuck in the mud, wheels spinning while the the real work that needs to be done keeps on piling up. Yes, we all have values and expectations and ideals and that is the fuel that, combined with passion, keeps us focused. There is a difference between focus and tunnel vision, however, and there needs to be room for healthy discussion, disagreement and compromise. If we decide another activist is coming from a certain theoretical perspective we run the risk of mentally running through the list of attributes we ascribe to that label so that we apply that scenario as predictive of his or her future behavior or motivations. It's really so much easier than actively listening to someone isn't it? Well yeah, it is...but the easy way out has never proven to be the successful way out. If it was we probably would have evolved to the point that I didn't need to be writing this.

A news break or disengagement from the political conversation, can be used as an opportunity to reflect on our own values, We can explore information about the things that matter to us, the things that inspire us and bring us hope. We return from our retreat with souvenirs and keepsakes that can be woven into the bigger pattern. Hopefully our sewing circle will welcome these contributions with an open mind and a trusting heart.

So next time you meet someone who disagrees with one of those fine points, those mismatched patches in the crazy quilt of ideology, take a moment to examine how they stitched those bits together. Get to know a bit about their history, their thoughts and feelings, their personal life circumstances. See the beauty in each sample of fabric that contributes the the strength and durability of the whole.

A Declaration of levity

I've had it with activism. Really? you ask.

Look, things are really fucked up right now and most of us know it. Most of have a lot of nice ideas mostly concepts, few actual concrete plans, to make the world a better, cleaner, safer, more equal opportunity kind of place. This is great I love reading and listening to ideas, they give me hope. We also do a lot of complaining about the way things are. This has it's purpose too, it's what motivates us and others to action. It's one way we can help educate and inform people who also really care and want a better world but barely even know how fucked up it is (much less how it got that way)

I've been having a lot of flashbacky memories from the 60's lately, probably because there's something about this time-place that feels similar. Discontent, government and military secrets exposed, assassinations (although they have learned to pick less dramatic attention drawing targets now) groups of people organizing and protesting, demanding change of some sort or another. People are flocking to counter-culture groups (do they use that word anymore?) seeking a sense of community and belonging. So yeah we are replaying many of the old tunes, to use a turn of phrase.

If you read this blog regularly you know I've been wrestling with my own demons as to how to most effectively create change, hope and all those happy sunny Obama-isms (please do not confuse my use of Obama-isms with an endorsement of said President). I am tired of demon-wrestling. I am tired of thinking, strategics, meeting, protesting and petitioning. Most of all I am tired of debating with other people, who ultimately desire the same goals and outcomes, but fail to catch any tread because they are too busy talking. I'm glad they're talking, it's a good thing, but those of us who have been at this for a while have had those conversations, we don't need to rehash the same socio-political theories...we've seen how well they translate into real life (spoiler alert college students and young ones-don't waste too much time beyond gaining a general grasp, ok?)

From now on I'm going with my gut, I'm letting my intuition guide me, and goddamn it, if we're all going down in a blaze of glory, or conversely in a slow sucking journey into the depths of poverty and government control, I'm going out in style...my style. I'm gonna have fun. I'm gonna laugh and sing and dance and play in spite and defiance of the "Man" and in celebration of Myself and my Loved ones.

Let the revolution be a party!

The Howl of the Activist

Blogging from my phone with its tiny keypad and mini screen is not my preferred means of communication. My aging eyes squint in tenacious determination from behind the lenses of my Walgreens +250 readers. I am dedicated to communication, to telling the stories behind the cardboard signs and the public persona of the "Person of The Year", the Protester. I tell the tale because that is Activism and I am an Activist.
In telling the tales there is no one profile to describe "The Protester". We come from all walks of life; we are Women, Men, Transgender, young, old and in-between. We are diverse in skin color, ethnicity, socioeconomic status and personal history. And now, suddenly, the meme of "activist" is ubiquitous; not since the 60's has the Activist or Protester so thoroughly captured the public eye. Of course we've been here all along doing what we do, living our lives in concert with our values and ideals to the best of our abilities. Most of us have managed to work our activism seamlessly into our lives whether it be by career path, volunteering or lifestyle choices such as living "green" shopping and gardening in ways that are sustainable and healthy for ourselves and our earth. Many have chosen spiritual paths that are in alignment with their activist principles. And some of us are letter writers, following legislation and expressing our thoughts to whomever may listen. There are endless ways to incorporate our values into every aspect of our if we live mindfully and authentically Naturally most of us have veered from the path in one way or another, often not by choice or preference but as the result of necessity, external influences or, face it, sometimes we simply hit a rough patch in life that throws us off track. It's all part and parcel of the Human experience.
Although I think I can justifiably say that I have been an activist most of my life, and like most I too have been sidetracked no and then by events in my life. But I always return to the core values to which I was raised. No matter how crappy life gets I recycle, I do my best to shop consciously as well as my budget will allow and I have a reputation for taking in strays, both human and four legged.
In all my years, I have rarely affiliated myself with any particular activist group or movement. I have participated in actions that have been sponsored by one group or another. When I had a reasonable income I donated money to s few causes and I have attended meetings and teach ins that were sponsored by activist organizations. For the most part however, I haven't felt the need to belong to any one particular cause or community. When the notion has struck me that it might be fulfilling to be a part of something bigger, there just never seemed to be the "right" fit. I am wary of groups for a number of reasons. Mostly it's simply a matter of personal choice, there are people who always feel more at home within a community of some sort, and others who prefer a small group of friends and family as their primary social circle. There is also, however, the cumulative result of the observations that I have made over the years as I've watched groups and communities form, develop and either grow, morph into something different than originally intended or die out completely depending on circumstances. As I said in my last post, sometimes the magic is there and sometimes it isn't.
For some reason, when Occupy Wall street came along and began to gain  traction throughout the nation I thought that maybe this was the 'thing' that was going to get me to break out of my shell and open myself to become a part of something much bigger. After all we Wisconsinites were all still fired up from the Madison protests and just a few months before that I had been active with local teachers organizations helping to save hundreds of jobs in our public schools. I felt a kinship with the teachers, some of them had taught at my son's school and had been instrumental in his academic success. And in Madison, with my very small group of friends and our families the excitement and hope was palpable, inducing a sort of 'natural high' as we stood in Solidarity with thousands in the snow and wind and ice.

So when Occupy came to town I went to the initial planning sessions, listened and participated.  On the first day of Solidarity, October 15th  I walked with thousands through the streets of downtown Milwaukee fueled by the energy that was sweeping the nation.  Gradually I became involved in the maintenance and daily operations of the Occupation site, a spot where Occupy Milwaukee has maintained a presence  since late October.  I have sat through endless meetings, slept in the park in the rain, cold and mud. I have made friends and yea, even a couple of enemies. I have helped plan actions and mediated internal conflict. I have made mistakes and I have created solutions. I have made sacrifices and reaped rewards. It's been an exciting couple of seasons. I've seen the group grow, struggle, learn, backslide and bounce back. I've seen factions forming both official and unofficial, some strong and with great potential, others, well time will tell. I'm impressed with the momentum of this movement, I'm saddened at some of the divisiveness I see that threatens in the days ahead, but that will all come out in the wash as my Grandma used to say. One would hope that there is a Unifying force that connects us all; the desire for a more just and peaceful world and although differences may arise in the methodology rather than the ideology I think he ideology is strong enough to withstand the challenge. Occupy may be here to stay. Beyond our on local community I've seen the name "Occupy" attached to just about every ideal, action or concept one can imagine. Soon it will be products, in fact I think there already are some. But after 5 months I still don't feel the fit of it on myself. Maybe it's my contrary nature, my not wanting to have to ask 'permission' for group consensus to attach the name "Occupy" to any action or statement. It feels a bit like possessiveness to me even though I fully understand the desire to maintain the integrity of the name. Maybe it's my reluctance to belong to any group that is defined by a name.  Maybe it's the internal conflicts that have plagued our own group and that never seem to give a moments rest. Somehow other people seem to be more resilient in their response to conflict and that may be a trait that separates "group people" from people like me.  I can only speak for myself, and when I speak I say I am an Activist, I am a Feminist, I am an Advocate for Human Rights, I am an Environmentalist, I am Anti-War and I am a bit of an Anarchist, and although I support the Occupy Movement, I am not the occupy movement. I don't need to identify with a name brand, I can't identify with a name brand. I gave the group thing a try and although I respect that it works for others I suspect it's not my cup of tea. I am a Lone Wolf I suppose and that's okay by me... I will howl at the Moon and my call is, and always will be the call of Lifetime of Activism.

The Making of an Activist

What can I say? I’ve neglected my “fun blog’ since the first post. I’d begun to wonder if I’d bitten off more than I could chew in the blogging, social media activist world in addition to writing my own memoirs and a short story.  My memoir avoids disclosing too much detail about my childhood for a couple of reasons; it’s difficult to retell the painful, chaotic parts without “outing” family members’ mistakes to the whole world. I don’t feel that would be fair to the adults in my life, most of who have learned from their mistakes and have reconciled any differences. Additionally the intention of my memoir is to bring into light the day to day realities experienced by women who live with problems like addiction and abusive relationships and I want put the focus on that time of my life where I was enmeshed in that world.

Although there are aspects of my childhood that contributed to my poor decision making later in life, there are probably more influences and events that provided me with the resiliency, problem solving skills and “Yankee ingenuity” which helped me to cope with, and eventually overcome, the challenges I’ve faced in my adult life. I also learned about equality, compassion and social justice which would later be influential in my career and my life’s work.

My parents taught me early on about poverty and economic disparity. We took a lot of road trips in those days, driving and camping in different parts of the East coast, Midwest and Canada. My father would take the time to explore different sections of cities, town and rural areas and would point out the disparities in the quality of life based on economic status and race. My parents took us to protests, marches and rallies speaking out against segregation, the war and unfair housing practices. I was inspired and thrilled by the energy and passion of these events, the people and their demands for Justice. By the time I was 8 I was contemplating going into politics, certain I could make a difference. I learned a tough lesson that year when both Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King, Jr were assassinated. I learned that it can be dangerous to challenge the status quo. I also watched the news reports of the protests in Selma, Alabama and remember seeing a young Black girl about my age being sprayed with a fire hose and hurled down the street, her white dress flying up and revealing her underwear. In 8 or 9 year old terms’ having one’s underwear revealed represents the worst kind of humiliation. I couldn’t fathom that grown men, policemen, would do such a horrible thing to a child. I knew then that even though you may pay with your life (or having your panties exposed!) the struggle for Justice was not going to go away and it was a battle that needed warriors.

In 5^th grade I had a wonderful, inspirational Social Studies teacher, Mrs. S. She inspired us students to get involved socially and politically. We celebrated the first Earth Day with a series of lessons on the Environment, and on the actual day we took to the playground with handmade signs and sidewalk chalk to draw pictures and messages on the blacktop. She also taught us about the “Vote 18 campaign” citing the injustice of drafting young men into war without giving them the right to participate in the political decision making process. Mrs. S was one of the most influential teachers in my life, I have no idea where she is now, or if she’s even still alive, but I think of her often and thank her for her passion and dedication and the personal attention she gave to a troubled little girl who was struggling with the injustices of the world.

Wherever you are Mrs. S, your legacy lives on.

Peace,

©2010 Jennifer Hazard